Congratulations! We both made it! We have managed to keep you full, warm, dry and safe enough for you to keep us around as parents.
Wesley we are so glad to have you in our lives. People one day may tell you how we would pray (and ask others to pray) that you would come at your due date because this month was so nuts at work for us both. We were such fools! Work schmwork. You are the best gift we’ve received in our lives.
This past month has gone by so fast and your daddy and I can’t imagine our lives without you. Just to give you an idea of how obsessed we are, pre-you, we talked about regularly scheduling date nights so we can remember to take care of US so we can better take care of you. Last Saturday your grandma (halmoni) and grandapa (haraboji) were so kind to give us a date night (though we have a suspicion that they wanted you to themselves for hours!) Your daddy and I went to get Italian (E’Tutto Qua) in the city and we missed you so much it made our hearts hurt. On the drive home I flipped through every single picture I had on my iphone, played every video and when I was finished, without even me having to ask, your father whipped out his phone so I could look through more pictures of you. We are obsessed.
The big topic of conversation we have with just about everyone who meets you is how much you look like your daddy. I have to say I called it in Week 20 when I saw an ultrasound of your little toes. Your toes are exactly like your father’s. You both have giant, flat feet with long edamame toes. You and your dad have a special relationship forming. I like to call it – let’s bond over annoying/picking on mom. On the second day of your life, you and your dad simultaneously passed gas in our hospital room (because I love you both I will not go into further details about which end gas came out of) and in that moment I felt like I was being hot boxed by my two brothers – except that I don’t have 2 brothers, I have one and even my own brother would never do that to me. Last night when daddy came home from work you were really angry and crying about we have no idea what, so your dad picked you up held you close and started fake wailing (read: mocking you) SO loud I thought you probably lost several ear hairs. You immediately stopped your wailing and started smiling… like you were saying “hey that wailing was pretty decent bro. next time try to go a little longer and until you hear a little bit of a vibrato and your face turns beet red. it freaks mom out. every. time.”
Everything everyone said about taking care of a newborn was right. Yes your mommy and daddy are sleep deprived. Yes breastfeeding is rough. Yes our lives have changed. But we weren’t prepared for how much we would love you and love being parents. All of our lives we have heard that God loves us and that we are His children. Cognitively, I got that… but it takes on a whole new shade now. Wesley you are the first person I have loved that has absolutely done nothing for me. That sounds harsh, but every single other relationship I have in this world is characterized by some sort of mutualism. I love my parents because they love me and have taken care great care of me my whole life. I love your daddy because he’s good looking. I love you because ___ . (TBD) Not only have you done nothing for me, you are seriously the neediest person I know. Yesterday I was so thirsty and my water bottle was just out of reach but you were finally asleep on me after fussing for awhile. Because I was convinced any muscle twitch or sound would wake you up I just sat there. On the couch. Parched. In silence. I promise promise promise in the moment I was not the slightest bit mad. I was even glad that I (literally) could be a place of rest and comfort for you. As a seven pounder, you are taking me to school about how to love selflessly. And I couldn’t be more thrilled.
This week you weighed in at 7 lbs 11 oz. Which is pretty incredible considering at one point you had dropped to 5 lb 5 oz.
Every week I’ve been taking you to your doctor’s office to be weighed. The receptionist and the nurses know me now. We always have the same conversation.
“Did the Dr. order a weight check for Wesley?”
“Oh okay! Mommy’s just curious!”
“Yes I am! I was just in neighborhood and I wanted to pop in!”
Thankfully this past month you have easing us into this parenting thing. In the beginning you wouldn’t even cry. Your “cries” sounded like a puppy that got stuck behind the couch. Your grandma (popo) thinks you’re an excellent communicator. And we have to agree. When you are hungry you do all the things babies do – root, wriggle, put your hand in your mouth, etc… When we see this we’ll start getting you food but sometimes when we don’t move fast enough you smack your lips and make eating sounds like you’re doing sign language. You must think your parents are idiots. Which isn’t too far from the truth, but thanks for going the extra mile so that there would be no confusion about what you really want. Also after you sneeze, you always let out this big sigh like that was the most exhausting thing you had to do all day. It makes us laugh every time.
Boobs (not just mine, but just about anyone – male or female. if they hold you close enough you will open your mouth and dive for them) being warm, cuddles, maybe Baroque music (still testing this out), lukewarm baths, when the booger police (daddy) uses the nose frida on you to pull out your boogers, Mamaroo (Motion setting: car ride), white noise, Pampers
Being naked, your gray overalls, Huggies diapers, that moment when we take you out of the lukewarm bath, tummy time